Building to world, one stick of ram at a time.

So, i built my new pc, and everything i put into it was top notch. Well, as top notch as you can get without having "Bill Gates hush hush on that sodomy thing" money. Put in a gigabyte Z68 board, a Intel I5 2600K, 64gb ssd, two 7200rpm 500gb hdd, some random drives i had lying around, and 8gb of nice n fast ram. Everything is ready to make your eyes bleed. With the exception of my graphics card. A 560ti. Now, don't get me wrong, its good, But its not "Kicked in the dick by a bear" Good.

I really liked the moral on this one.

Now, I do plan on replacing it, with two 590's, right after i can find myself a nice and easily pry-able open elevator shaft, and then i better call Saul. Whats that you say? Reddit gifts who? I've never heard of no gosh darned internet, and this newfangled internet you speak of, SO GET OFF MY LAWN YOU DAM KIDS. No, this is not an attempt to squander two 700 dollar graphics cards outta some nice soul, that just be crazy. Seriously, on the off chance you're reading this Secret Santa gent/ladygent; I will accept nothing less than a Hitori Hanzo blade, NOTHING LESS.

I will consider space stations, On a case by case basis. Lasers not optional.

So now you ask, "Is there any reason for a blog update other than to gloat about your new hardware, and to be your usual dick self?". I answer you with "Yes, this is my blog, now, go get daddy a beer.". One day you'll wise up to the fact that blogging is really nothing but an online diary where people only write the cool shit the want other people to read, in an effort to boost their image, hopefully to the "My sac is inside of a strangers mouth" level. That's the ultimate goal. Now i may be married now, but that doesn't stop me from desiring other people to desire my sac. That's pretty much been the goal of humanity since its deformed monkey fetus dropped from 'tween the first confounded Australopithecus's bowlegged, bipedal walking sticks. Just look at any great story of heroes, It always ends in hopefully successive sodomy.

"Bj's you fools!"

This about sums it up for now. I covered sodomy, pre-human birth, space stations, and bears. All that's left for my life is to grow a beard that would make Chuck Norris smear his own feces upon his body in an effort to hide from the (Presumably predator jaw shaped) jaw pube monstrosity-that-has-gained-Skynet-level-sentience on my face.Speaking of pubes, did you know a nipple hair is also called a pube (Pronounced Pue-bay)? Well you do now. Also, be aware that at any given time you shake someones hand, its quite possible they just got threw shitting, ripped threw the tp, and accidentally slipped a finger up the bung. Wash or no wash, that's disturbing. Adios muchacos! Until next time!

Get your own look Chuck.

Change is never change.

Today i bring a regular post. Not a comedic raging vent. Not a remorseful speech. Not a lesson on the correlation of mass, to gravity, as is concerned to the formation of planets from sub atomic debris from a supernova. Just an observation. This observation, is all about change, how it effects us, and how it affects us. Much the reason you, and I for that matter, am alive. For without change, there would be no evolution. Let us discuss, in depth, change.

Change is good.

To many of us familiar with Wayne's World, A young Mr. Garth Algar taught us that "Change is not good, we fear change" and that all mechanical hands that gain sentience should be smashed with hammers. While i agree with this, there is a great difference between chosen change, and forced change. With chosen change, we decide our path, look at our options, and place our destiny in our own solemn capable hands. This is the change that takes you from the teat, to a boy afraid of spiders, to a man with a fierce beard that is used to preform open chest heart surgery on non-anesthesia'd tigers. A raw man. Without change, you would have never decided to stop sucking tits, hating spiders, and sleeping all day because pimples sucked. Simply put, you changed into a better dude. You became who you wanted to be, and damned the world if they dont like it.

Change is bad.

Earlier today, i was watching a show on TLC. Mind you, that acronym used to stand for "The LEARNING Channel" and now stands for "Topographic Layouts of Crap". Now the show that was on was "What not to wear". If you are unfamiliar with it, good, I'm still a decent human in your eyes. If you are, well... I'm sorry i let you down. Anyway... In this show, they take a reasonably happy human being, look at them and say, "your a piece of shit, and look like you should be eaten by raptors.". The summarily they dress them up in "cool"(Read: Expensive) clothes, have someone do their hair, and someone do their makeup. Now... I'm not one to say that professional hair-doo-er guys, or makeup "artist's" are terrible at their craft, but check what happens next. They ask "ready to show the new YOU!!!!" to which she responds "Um... Not really...". "What?" they reply, and demand that she "Get out here!". She saunters out of the back room, clearly confused about her body, face, hair, and wardrobe.. They see this, see their work, and proclaim "Dont be sad! Look how beautiful you are", after a 15,000 makeover. I mean cmon chica, you coulda looked like this the whole time, if only you stoped being yourself, spent half a years salary on your looks, and chose the correct clothes to buy.

It made me sad. To see this woman, happy  with who she is, to be torn down by stylist "experts" (i always thought style was a personal thing, not a science that you can receive a doctorate in) because she didn't wear makeup, or do her hair in a certain way. Then to see her change herself, to conform with there definition of beautiful  and them proclaim "Now you're beautiful!". Beauty is not something you can buy. Its not something someone can give you. Beauty is certainly not a bunch a dicks slapping crap on your face, then seeing you self conscious saying "Look how good we think you are to our standards now!". End result, she changed to fit their molds, and is now miserable.

Final thought.

Change is what drives the universe to evolve. But this evolution is not on its own, its in constant pull and give with all other change, all over the universe, ALL THE TIME. Just because there are no natural predators to stylist, or magazine writers, does not mean their ideas evolved the predators away. Our ancestors did that, with knives, teeth, claws, bones, and their life's. Every time you read Cosmo, and take that advice, your punching a promethium in the face. Be yourself. Make NEW ideas, and make those who have their own fight for there prominence. Competition is the key to good change. Otherwise, in 5000 years, when the people of the future find an open your time capsule that you participate in during the second grade, and reorganize your DNA into a body from a eyelash that fell into it... You'll awake to a landscape of buildings shaped like Hannah Montannatron, and fast food restaurants that only serve pure 100% air burgers.

Don't say i didn't warn you.

On the thoughts of men.

Throughout time, as far back as science has permitted thus far, men and women have recorded history. Once in a long while, ideas were writ, some good, some great, others not so much. This is a fact. Long,as a race, have we been doing so. So forth have we also been reading the wisdom of the past. Many may say this is the source of our greatest strength. Knowledge. I disagree. While it is true that it allows all of us currently living to learn from the mistakes and success of the past, it also allows us to follow in their delusions. Within so, at times, a retard will learn to write, and someone will read that... Without the knowledge of said retardation, and fail to apply critical thinking to the situation. Thus, we enter the age of shitbrains.

Example one

This would not be a problem, in the circumstance that education was viable and successful. Education, which is largely based upon knowledge. Knowledge, which is based upon the teaching of old. Teachings, which may, or may not have been writ by an idiot. Think about this for one second. What do you know? How did you learn it? Whom do you have to blame for all your failures? If your answers were different than: Uhhhh, alot... From stuff... and uhhh what? the past i guess... then drop this class. GAME OVER. you lost before you began. I usually try to avoid blogging drunk (the reason i haven't updated in so long) because my writing suffers greatly from it. Im kinda lik the hamburgular in the midst of a "Best Bbq'ed burger" contest. Im all over the fucking place. But fuck it, stick with me through it. Pwease?

THE BIBLE.
So some guy said: "Yo son, i heard that this killing and shit be outta control. Lets write a book bout that shit.". Next thing you know, it expanded. Though shalt not kill. Though shall not rape. Though shall not be human, etc... etc... And BAM. People failed to apply critical thinking, and bullshit blossomed. Its okay, if your religious, its not your fault, blame your parents. Honestly though, its not their fault... The were taught by... OMG!.. Their parents! Thus the cycle goes back, for EONS. Every bad thing that has ever been done, is the fault of our ancestors. They did not have the foresight to put the enclosure warning "Seriously... just think about that shit and make up your own mind about it."

Nevermind... Its perfect.

   THE CONSTITUTION.
Once upon a time a bunch of dudes said: "Enough of this shit! Im not paying taxes on whores so King George can wax his asshole!" and decided to say "FUCK YOU" in an official statement.This is called the Constitution. In that document, they attempted to put in writing, a bunch of shit that says, in summation: "Don't be a dick bro, and if someone is a dick, fuck em". That includes the bill of rights... Yes, you have the right to bear arms. Why? In case some dick says: "Fuck you, ima take your shit caus i want to" and he trys it. Shoot his ass. Your shit is yours. This doesn't mean "I NEED MANY GUNS BECAUSE JOHN ADAMS SAID SO". You dont NEED a gun. You don't NEED to shoot people to stop them from taking your shit. But still, others think, that since it was writ, it is as said, without interpritation, as truth and law. You have the right to a freedom of speech. This does not mean you can say whatever you want, without recourse... If you are being a dick, i may snuff you in the dome piece. Shit... Who knows... Were just all animals.

Shit like this.

EVERYTHING.
All in all... We are but a insane amount of carbon based molecules, arranged in an inconceivable order, as the result of a incomprehensible series of events, formed over an unfathomable amount of time. FUCK YOU. Think you can fathom it? Fathom that time is but a made up thing, conjured in the past, by someone who thought the world was; "Flat, The center of the universe, Alone, controlled by invisible beings, and susceptible to human sacrifices.". People believe that shit... Why? Because their parents said so. And so on... and so on... The greatest ruler in all the world once said: " Hear my words, and do not write them. Decide unto thine self the meaning, and use just course to decifer the truth. Use this to create your own ideas, to share and discuss civially amongst your peers, and thus make a better world.". This person never existed... He never ruled, and no one heeded his teachings.

Close, but no... WOA, its so crates...

The world is crazy. People more so. Although learning is good.... Bias is bad. Nothing is predetermined. There is no fate. Learn, but make up your own mind. Nothing is as THEY say it is. Be yourself, and better the world. Dont listen to me though.... Make up your own mind. After all, who the fuck am I?

On the thoughts of men.

Throughout time, as far back as science has permitted thus far, men and women have recorded history. Once in a long while, ideas were writ, some good, some great, others not so much. This is a fact. Long,as a race, have we been doing so. So forth have we also been reading the wisdom of the past. Many may say this is the source of our greatest strength. Knowledge. I disagree. While it is true that it allows all of us currently living to learn from the mistakes and success of the past, it also allows us to follow in their delusions. Within so, at times, a retard will learn to write, and someone will read that... Without the knowledge of said retardation, and fail to apply critical thinking to the situation. Thus, we enter the age of shitbrains.

Example one

This would not be a problem, in the circumstance that education was viable and successful. Education, which is largely based upon knowledge. Knowledge, which is based upon the teaching of old. Teachings, which may, or may not have been writ by an idiot. Think about this for one second. What do you know? How did you learn it? Whom do you have to blame for all your failures? If your answers were different than: Uhhhh, alot... From stuff... and uhhh what? the past i guess... then drop this class. GAME OVER. you lost before you began. I usually try to avoid blogging drunk (the reason i haven't updated in so long) because my writing suffers greatly from it. Im kinda lik the hamburgular in the midst of a "Best Bbq'ed burger" contest. Im all over the fucking place. But fuck it, stick with me through it. Pwease?

"Nut he stole MY burgers..."

THE BIBLE.
So some guy said: "Yo son, i heard that this killing and shit be outta control. Lets write a book bout that shit.". Next thing you know, it expanded. Though shalt not kill. Though shall not rape. Though shall not be human, etc... etc... And BAM. People failed to apply critical thinking, and bullshit blossomed. Its okay, if your religious, its not your fault, blame your parents. Honestly though, its not their fault... The were taught by... OMG!.. Their parents! Thus the cycle goes back, for EONS. Every bad thing that has ever been done, is the fault of our ancestors. They did not have the foresight to put the enclosure warning "Seriously... just think about that shit and make up your own mind about it."

Nevermind... Its perfect.

   THE CONSTITUTION.
Once upon a time a bunch of dudes said: "Enough of this shit! Im not paying taxes on whores so King George can wax his asshole!" and decided to say "FUCK YOU" in an official statement.This is called the Constitution. In that document, they attempted to put in writing, a bunch of shit that says, in summation: "Don't be a dick bro, and if someone is a dick, fuck em". That includes the bill of rights... Yes, you have the right to bear arms. Why? In case some dick says: "Fuck you, ima take your shit caus i want to" and he trys it. Shoot his ass. Your shit is yours. This doesn't mean "I NEED MANY GUNS BECAUSE JOHN ADAMS SAID SO". You dont NEED a gun. You don't NEED to shoot people to stop them from taking your shit. But still, others think, that since it was writ, it is as said, without interpritation, as truth and law. You have the right to a freedom of speech. This does not mean you can say whatever you want, without recourse... If you are being a dick, i may snuff you in the dome piece. Shit... Who knows... Were just all animals.

Shit like this.

EVERYTHING.
All in all... We are but a insane amount of carbon based molecules, arranged in an inconceivable order, as the result of a incomprehensible series of events, formed over an unfathomable amount of time. FUCK YOU. Think you can fathom it? Fathom that time is but a made up thing, conjured in the past, by someone who thought the world was; "Flat, The center of the universe, Alone, controlled by invisible beings, and susceptible to human sacrifices.". People believe that shit... Why? Because their parents said so. And so on... and so on... The greatest ruler in all the world once said: " Hear my words, and do not write them. Decide unto thine self the meaning, and use just course to decifer the truth. Use this to create your own ideas, to share and discuss civially amongst your peers, and thus make a better world.". This person never existed... He never ruled, and no one heeded his teachings.

Close, but no... WOA, its so crates...

The world is crazy. People more so. Although learning is good.... Bias is bad. Nothing is predetermined. There is no fate. Learn, but make up your own mind. Nothing is as THEY say it is. Be yourself, and better the world. Dont listen to me though.... Make up your own mind. After all, who the fuck am I?

An american walker goes west.... Errr... um... east?

So here it is. All my lazying about, not updating, drinking booze and playing games couldnt stop it. The day has come. My bags are packed, and im about to begin my cross country journey. Well, my bags arnt packed... Shit, and im bringing this computer... Double shit...

FUCK.
Sorry guys, procrastination has to wait, i gotta pack.

Muahz!

There was a man...

Sometimes, when i think upon the universe... I think about the your gentleman who grew into Aristotle. What were his dreams as a child? His asperations as a toddler...

Turns out, you're awesome!

So on a rather quick turnaround; I’ve decided to do an anti-hate post… Something about the people in my life which I enjoy. People that enrich that little bit of existence we all know as life. Now you all know how I feel about the universe, its great big void of awesome and cool shit aside, it’s a pretty fucking desolate place. That’s what make is so damn special, and exactly what makes that dumb shitface hipster who complains about his macchiato not having enough cream that much more infuriating. You know what, just because your mother slapped you in the face once when you shit your pants at that wedding does not mean that you can act that way, it just means she was a terrible parent, and is probably the reason you went from a kid with asshole control problems, to a asshole who wants to cover everything else in your shit life. GET OVER IT. Wait… I’m supposed to be talking about joyous things… Back to the program jeeves!

"Yes sir, and if there's nothing else, it think ill go try and die in my sleep now"

First up: Silent hero’s

You think I’m talking about you because you donated you old underwear to the goodwill? No, I’m not, your bullshit, and so are they. I’m talking about the people out there who do things not for recognition, but because they are driven to it and never even ask for a thank you. Hell, most times these people are impossible to thank anyway, since you never even notice they influenced you at all. People who pick up garbage by the garbage can, and put it in there, even if it’s not their trash. The reason your house isn’t covered in old newspapers, and that curtain your grandmother threw up on because she was having a seizure when you said the word “fuck” at age two (good job, you killed grandma), is because people take your garbage out. When’s the last time you even saw your garbage man. These dudes handle everything from old coffee grinds to miscarried kittens. Why, because they get paid for that shit. Think about the courage it takes to pick up a napkin off a New York City street and throw it away. At a minimum, that shit is at least 3 seconds of contact with a piece of trash covered in possibly anything from mustard and boogers to bum dick puss. Don’t be fooled, those bums are busy popping cock pimples for at least 3 hours a day, I mean what the fuck else is for them to do, learn piano?

Here's puppies... For the love of god, do not ever, ever, EVER google "Bum dick pimple"with safe search off.

This isn’t limited to trash, but there are people out there doing little insignificant things everyday, that they don’t have to. These are the people who make the world a better place, one stupid thing at a time. Being a sailor, I get thanked rather regularly for my “service to my country”. I highly doubt even for a second that the majority of these people even know what it is to serve in the military, or why they are thanking me. They just do it because they think it’s what patriotic people are supposed to do. Guess what dipshit, although I consider it an honor to be in the military, don’t fucking kid yourself and think I would do it for free. I get paid. It’s my job. Why don’t you go down to the subway station and thank that heroin addict for not stabbing you in the neck. He had to use a LOT of self restraint to do that, and he in his own way, was being a silent hero that day. So just think about it next time you’re walking down the street, every person who isn’t attacking you to get at that sweet neck blood, of throwing their feces in your face is being a mildly decent human. Thank them for it. Maybe I shouldn’t be writing this while resident evil is on in the background…

Pictured: A model citizen

Next: People who don’t lie.

Now the truth isn’t always convenient. Sometime she really does look fat in that dress, and someone has to tell that stuck up bitch to her face! That person doesn’t have to be you though… Omitting the truth, so we can get that dank blowjob behind the McDonalds on Main Street is sometimes, a necessity. That’s not what we’re talking about here; I'm speaking about the TRUE truth. Whether or not you think lady gaga is a scientific abomination of humanity. What exactly you do, and do not, enjoy in bed. What you really feel about those shitty Tyler Perry movies.

Sooo good.

These things, at the heart of the matter, are the real truth. You know who you hurt by lying about you basketball skills and that one time you played a pickup game against Lebron James and dunked on him? You, and only you, because no one buys that shit for a second. The shit that really starts to stink up the place are those lies you tell that people will believe. Sure, nobody wants to tell grandpa that when he makes the dough for his cookies with those open sores and flakey skin on his hands that it makes everyone want to put him in a nursing home. Someone has to say that shit though. Otherwise you’re all going to keep eating those nasty, bloody, skin flavored sugar cookies. Sure it makes him happy, but it makes everyone else miserable, so cut the shit and buy him a cat. These truths usually don’t get you very far into people’s hearts, but you know where they do get you? Reality. If parents just bucked the fuck up and told Tommy that his pet turtle died because “his shell was not pajamas and part of his fucking body you evil little monster” instead of “that it was gods plan”, maybe Tommy wouldn’t grow up looking forward to his next taste of hooker flesh sautéed in dog blood. Children are stupid. Mind numbingly so. They are also smart as shit. The main reason they are so retarded is because they place faith in trust in fuck head people like you. Left alone to his own wits, he would eventually figure out that his dog didn’t run away, wasn’t coming back, and is actually dead. Thanks to you, this poor little kid sits up at night thinking that every bark he hears is the triumphant return of Mr. Pickles the rottweiler.

"I dont understand mom, i heard him scratching at the door"

It goes deeper than this. Maybe some of your friends would stop hanging out with you if they knew you didn’t think “Depeche mode is the most influential band of our time.”. Guess what, do you really want to be friends with someone who not only likes dépêche mode, but also is so fickle and asinine that they choose their friends based upon their musical favoritism? If you answered yes, GET THE FUCK OFF MY PAGE ASSHOLE. Seriously though, the people who matter most in your life shouldn’t care about what kind of pizza you like. True friends don’t care that you get down to scat porn, as long as you keep that shit in your room, or do it outside on a tarp. Most ultimately, you just need to be yourself, and love you first. That’s the only way you’ll ever have meaning full relationships in your life, when you actually have a life. Stop emulating things, stop wearing clothes you don’t like, stop watching crap you don’t want to see. You think anyone comes out of the womb addicted to the beauty and symmetry presented in the song “Poker face”. No. They think someone else thinks that shit is cool, and if they pretend its cool, then they will be cool by proxy. You know what’s cool? Nothing. It’s not a scientific value dumbass. It’s not gravity, its not speed, it’s not the hokey pokey (that’s what it’s all about son). Cool is not quantifiable. It’s not something you can procure through assimilation or pretend. It’s something people of like mind give others of like mind. No matter what, even if everyone believes your charade, when you’re laying there in your bed at night, alone with your thoughts, you know the truth.

"Im so happy my wife died, too bad i never told her that her cooking sucked"

Let’s keep rolling: People who admit their wrong.

Nobody like doing this shit, NOBODY. Not the president, not that crackhead down on eighth, not O.J.Simpsons character references before he went on trial. That’s what makes it such a worthwhile character trait. You know how different the world could have been if Hitler woulda just came out and said “Listen guys, you know this whole master race thing, well… turns out I was just a little pissed of that my neighbor Brokahiem Lebrowsky stopped giving me a BJ halfway through when I was 15, so lets call it off eh?”. He didn’t though. He just kept up the delusion that somehow Jewish people were wack, instead of admitting he loved the sack. HA! See what I did there?? Anyway, just like most men out there, I’m a pig headed, beard growing, card carrying member of the never wrong club. I try and constrict this to arguments with my woman when we debate the best way to cut down a tree, kill a bear with a tent pole, or the perfect spice to use when you need to cover up that “stabbed in the face with a katana” flavor present in what ever meat your preparing that night. But that’s a mans realm anyway. I don’t tell her how to fold the dishes or what laundry detergent to put on her tampons, or whatever the fuck women do.

I have no idea what drives you creatures

Sometimes you gotta look at yourself in the mirror, long and hard and just say “I’m so fucking stupid, and in no way is what I said correct”. The replace the mirror with the person who you said that dumb shit to, and continue with your life. You won’t be casting yourself into the fires of mount doom, or get molested by the puppeteer for Kermit the frog (he has VERY strong hands). Nothing at all will happen. Actually that’s a lie, that person will not only gain respect for you, but you will also be able to gain a small shred of humanity back. It’s really easy to do, and you will become addicted to it. I sometimes find myself just making some outrageous comment to people like a dyslexic Wikipedia, just so I can go back and say “You know what, now that I think about it, Yule Brenner was not Hon Solo, it was probably just a sex dream I had.”. It’s literally the easiest thing you can do to be a better person. It’s actually less than nothing, since all you’re doing is retracting a statement, it’s a negative action. Not negative like Darth Maul baby sitting and using his lightsaber to warm the babies’ milk then feed the baby with it, negative mathematically clown. Just give it a shot, be a hero.

"I only dropped it once! A new high score!"

Lastly: Everyone else.

Oh yes, just about every one of you motherfuckers. Yeah, sure in my last update, I rather harshly included all of you twat munching, shit receptacles into the last category of people I hated. You know what though, not only are we most likely related through our great, great, great, great ancestor Genghis Khan, making us brother/sisters (seriously that dude got AROUND), but you’re a fellow human. That’s all that’s required for you to have all the tools necessary to be my friend. Yes, its quite possible that id rather strain the juice from the bottom of a dumpster, selectively press it through some filters, concentrate this secretion, mix it with vodka, and inject that directly into my heart before I would hang out with you. That’s not important though. You know why? People can change. This is true primarily because the world is not full of small stupid babies. We must grow and change physically and mentally just to continue existing, and since this is a fact evident in all life, I know you can do it too. Yes, you beautiful special flower you. You can choose to wake up tomorrow, feed your cat like you always do, and decided “Today, ill probably stop hating Mexican people just because I don’t know how to say burrijah correctly”.  Bam, one step closer to being my friend. I also think I can feel free to that you’re at least somewhat decent because you’re at least reading my blog. At the very least, you’re well on your way to being absolutely bat shit insane. Just keep reading, and when you find yourself locked in the basement, wearing a gundum suit made from old beer cans and tinfoil, drunk on a crude alcohol distilled from your own urine, blasting tom petty songs backwards while punching holes in the wall to build you “demon proof dragon lair” look me up, and fucking thank me.

Your welcome

Turns out, you suck.

Oh god, what in the world is he complaining about now?

You, you stupid retarded fuck. Not specifically you, but you as a whole humanity.

To start this off, I must say that in no way do I consider myself better than you, I just think you a far worse than me. The same thing? Maybe, but I think that it proves I am better than you that I would say that I'm not, so there! So I must place my top hat, monocle, and sense of righteousness to set the world right! One funny joke, hypocritical statement at a time.

First up: Super fit facebook guy.

You fucking know who you are, at least you should. If you’re questioning whether or not you are this dude, just look at your posts. If more than 50% percent of your posts are about your workout, your diet, or anything fitness related… you’re probably him. If most of your images are of you, shirtless, in a menagerie of poses ranging from “Mirror shirtless muscle pose” to “Shirtless without mirror muscle pose” than you’re definitely this guy.

"I look good, Everyone come see how good i look"

Simply put, you’re a douche. I understand, better than most it seems, that the more time you spend in the gym is a direct coefficient to the amount of hate you have for fat people, and higher self esteem. Yeah, fat people are fat. But you know how many calories reading a FB post burns? Hint: less than the 4 hour gym session you just did, and felt we all needed to know about in detail, with images, narrated in your internal Arnold Schwarzenegger monologue style. Fat people are fat for a reason, and it’s not because they aren’t reading your facebook. I’m sure actually reading your facebook is just making them feel worse about themselves, and they go finding solace in that double size bucket of mint chocolate chip.

Sweet relief

Next up: Fat people.

Hey you fat piece of shit, did you think I would forget about you just because super fit guys are a pain in the ass too??? I’m sure there’s a group of people out there with a medical condition that makes them acquire strange masses of growths on them, but you’re not in that group. Those people look like the elephant man, not perfectly symmetrical balls of fat consuming family sized buckets of KFC. You don’t not have fibromyalgia. Although I won’t go as far as to say that fibromyalgia isn’t real, I’m sure it is. I’m sure out there is someone who for no reasons whatsoever, wakes up in the middle of the night, screaming in terror and pain because their brain makes them feel like scorpions are latched onto their spinal cord. That not you. Your knee pain? It’s because you have 400lbs staked up on that shit. Knees aren’t made for that full time dude. Seriously, Darwin was a pretty smart guy, and I’m sure if being that obese had any sort of physical advantage, you knee’s would be more similar to the Shocks on a Ford F100 than that small, delicate, calcium based hinge they are now.

A medical condition for sure

It not even that hard to stop being fat. For fucks sake you squat 400lbs every time you stand up. You have any idea how hard that is? You know what kind of shape you’re in under all that fat? If you could remove all that fat at once, you’d be a god dammed Olympian. That massive lard filled hammer you call a hand? It’s like curling a 45lb dumbbell every time you take a bite of your twinkee. You probably have glorious biceps under there. Ask one of your fit friends to strap 200lbs to their back them climb a set of stairs. Then laugh when they’re sweating profusely just like you at the top. There’s not much to getting fit. Just stop eating so fucking much. That’s it. You don’t even need much physical exercising because just hauling your own fat ass around is the most extreme workout that can be conceived. Seriously, you can do this.

Next: Religious people.

No, I’m not talking about you MR. or MRS. “I love everybody and don’t use my religion to hurt anyone” person. Sure, you’re an idiot, and that’s your own issue, but I don’t hate you for it. I’m talking about someone who loves god so much, that they must hate people just because some dipshit once thought he heard god say “fuck gay people son” then wrote that shit in a book. It’s a fucking book. Don’t let it be the only thing in your life that matters. Just think if we replaced the bible with the TWILIGHT series. Can you imagine that there would literally be a war between the people who thought that Bella said “I love vampires a lot” and those who thought she said “I have a lot of love for vampires”? Millions of people killed, not because she chose team Edward, or team Jacob… But over the wording of particular passages, and the interpretations people got from them. Here’s an interpretation for you, SHE FUCKING LOVES VAMPIRES ASSHOLE. For fucks sake, who cares how she said it. If the dudes a vamp, she blows em, end of story. Glorious, shining in the sun, vampire boners stabbing her tonsils till the end of time. Without the metaphor this pretty much boils down to where god said to one guy “don’t be a dick” and he went off thinking of all the ways a dick could be, and how not to be one, and wrote that shit in a book. Then years later someone took that book of dickery, change some of the words to penis, cock, balls, schlong. Years after that some assholes tried to take that, and identify all the parts of each dick and penis and cock into their separate parts. Now that many interpretations later, would you use this as a manual to operate on your dick? Didn’t think so. So stop being a dick. It’s that simple. Gay people aren’t stopping you from being happy, your wife not sucking your dick is doing that for you fine. Shut the fuck up, and just stop. God wants you to get a blow job. Seriously, Google that shit.

How can they not tell this is stupid

Lastly: Everyone else.

Just because I’m to lazy to specifically call you out, doesn’t mean your not a douche bag. Shit, I even hate those arrogant asshats who go out making lists of people they hate, while not really even saying anything worth wile, for no reason other than their own edification. Humanity at its whole is full of dingle berries not fit for survival. People who hat based upon ignorance. People who lie, cheat, steal, and murder. People who listen to lady gaga. This shit has to stop. Unfortunately, there is no such thing as social Darwinism. The things that are cool and hip or relevant are controlled by what you see on TV, internet, and magazines. Not just adds, but do you think CNN would cover some bullshit in Iraq if they didn’t think enough people would watch it to stick around through commercials for blueberry hot pockets?

Or whatever the fuck this is...

Ads pay for shit. People buy that shit. The people who make that shit, and shit like it think “let’s make some shit kind of like this and see if people buy that”. Other shit makers copy that shit. That shit needs to be advertized. You see that shit, people talk about that shit, and the word gets around about that shit. The cycle continues. You’re a part of it. Think “I’m too smart to be a part of that shit”? Well you own a computer right? Why did you buy that brand? “I did a competitive analysis of all the products in my price range, and compared the hardware based upon what I needed, and bought the best that I could find”. Where did you read about this hardware? I seriously doubt you got your ole passport out, flew to Bangladesh and walked around the silicone processing plant and compared their mixing machines to those in the Peshawar one. You read that shit online. From a site that most likely received that item for free. You know how that site makes money? Ads motherfucker.

OH SHIT!

A follow up, imspired by my wonderous woman.

This is in no way about changing anyone. To say that you believe in a higher power, in the form that you believe that there are things out there in the universe that we will never understand, and weren't meant to is agnostic in the classical sense. There are people in this world who believe that vaccinating your children is a sin. A sin. The bible says so. The belief in the bible, that it is a tool, to learn from and not a verbatim word of god is healthy. Every story we read or hear since birth is something we can learn from. Every movie, book, short story, campfire tale, true false and in between. I'm not out to "change" anybody. I'm not trying to murder the children. I'm not trying to say you can believe in your own personal god. I'm not saying you cant do, whatever the fuck you want to do, when you want to do it... I'm saying you cant do that when it interferes with what other people want to do. You MUST vaccinate your children because if you don’t, they will infect other children. An example of when personal choice, not only impacts others, but greatly so. http://sethmnookin.com/2011/04/06/todays-lesson-alternative-virginia-school-closes-after-half-of-its-students-infected-with-pertussis-all-of-them-were-unvaccinated/
You can do a quick google search and find tons of stories just like this. Children unvaccinated due to religious purposes spreading disease to others unintentionally and putting others in danger. Are those other kids sick and dying because that kid believes in god? No. Because his parents do? No. They are sick and dying because his parents believe so feverishly, they cannot question it. At all. "It is the word. It is the truth. God must have wanted their son to die. To be sick. Its not my fault, I am not to blame. God did it. "
THAT IS NOT WHAT FAITH IS ABOUT.
Faith is not to be about blaming things on someone, or something that cannot be seen or prosecuted. Faith is not a blanket to hide under. Faith is a highly personal choice, and should be so.
Belief in god, to explain that which you do not know is fine. That feeling in your stomach, when you know something bad has happened, and cant explain why. That moment that seems to last forever just before you almost get in a car accident. The amazingly ungraspable depth and distance and wonderment of our universe. Millions of forces all intricately in constant sway and cohesion, balance and unrest, coexisting with an almost unfathomable sublimity. The atoms in your eyes, vibrating at just the right frequency to combat the small amount of magnetism and gravitation influence that holds them together, in varying states and clusters of millions to form cells. Specialized for processing of visual stimuli in the visible spectrum of light. Light which travels at 700 million miles an hour to bombard these clusters with BILLIONS of photons a millisecond. Light which is being emitted from a artificial source. You computer, harnessing the same electric and magnetic energy that is found in the heart of stars, to precise timing, through an incredibly intricate network of silicon carbonate particulate boards, and the very speed of light. Just so you can read this. Lets not even get into the central nervous system. Its incredible. Every minute detail of it. I can go on in incredible depth about the things that are going on. All at the same time. All with incredible precision. It seems strange to assume this all happened by chance. That through nothing, there became not only something, but something so outstandingly complex. It suits many to imagine a designer for this.
A designer of impeccable skills. In this manner, the word God is nothing more that a word, for a thing we cannot understand. A word that could be replaced by anything, and yet the meaning would not change. This driving force that created everything, as it was, through millennia's uncountable, in precise order up until this very moment, would be no less wondrous if we called it gibilty gook. A little more cumbersome in conversation yes, but if we agree that we are talking about the same thing, then what's in a name? Does a rose not smell as sweet if called by another name? This form of belief is fine, for if we admit the name is not what matters, what difference if you call the creative force behind the universe god, and I call it chance? The universe will be no less splendid. The events that formed it, no different. The wonder, no less wondrous.
This belief is fine. Believing, that no matter what, nobody could ever change your mind, about any part of your belief, at any time, for any reason, is insane. If you will not change your mind, then there is not even a point of discussion, and I would not speak with such a person. I don’t care about that person EXCEPT that they will infect others. That kid who infected his school with disease, a by product of the parents beliefs and choices. He will grow one day to have his own children, who he will teach to believe. This is the passing of faith. Not the choice of faith. If you change your mind, and willingly choose to believe when you did not, then so be it. If you were born into slavery and just accepted it, then you may yet live with that happily, but I know it is wrong, That there is better out there for you.
Make no mistake, those born into religion, without the freedom of questioning it are slaves all the same. Freedom is not only a way of life, but also a mindset.

Battle stations, Battle stations! All hands to Battle stations!

I was going to start this off by saying that this is increasingly becoming my sailor diary, and then I remembered that it’s been that since its inception. Simply put, that’s all it may ever be, but that’s enough. It’s at a minimum a place I can toss all my digital stuff so I can access it easier. Haha, its something.

Onwards and upwards as they say.

One of my closest friends has been on a “militant atheist” kick for a bit, and it’s got me thinking. Now I was raised catholic, and while I can recall being a young child and praying for childrenesque things, I cannot actually recall believing in god. It’s always been a subject that I have not understood really. Not to say I don’t know anything about it, quite the contrary really, I was an alter boy, and took bible study classes until I was 14. What I do not understand is how people bought into it. I guess those priest were right for never giving me the wedding or funeral ceremonies (the ones that paid, 10 dollars!). I understand the concept, and how people would want to believe, but not the actual believers. Much alike childhood me, wishing I was adopted, and that my real parents were going to come rescue me from a life where ramen was considered a delicacy. I knew how great it would be for there to be a “god” but knew there was not. To this day I still wonder if anyone truly believes, or is just having a lapsed episode of faith remorse. They must, no body would go out and kill someone in the name of some wizard they didn’t TRULY believe existed right?

Well, maybe not…

I myself could not see myself wanting to murder someone. Sure, self defense, of course. In defense of those I love? No problem. Defense of an innocent? Yeah, I guess. Defense of someone I don’t know? Mmmm… Maybe… Someone for any other reason? Unlikely. Not everyone out there shares this moral objection I have. It serves to me to label those who would do such a thing as crazy. You can see the point in trying to make here. Those who would do such a thing, without a reason that is rational, are by definition are irrational. Irrationality is but one handful of shit away from full on asshat insane.

So this got me to thinking, that sure, there are those who would believe in a god without a rational reason, just as those who believe in murder without a rational reason. Is that to say all religious people are crazy? Yes... With all things, with exception of mathematics, there are levels here. Not all religious people are “EAT ALL THE SQUIRRELS, THEY HAVE WMD’S!!!” tinfoil hat, room full of containers of their own excrement crazy. For that level to even exist, there must be something contrasted to it. Perhaps lady who owns 10 cats who all have sweaters crazy. Sure, I won’t let her watch my kids, but she’s not hurting anyone right?

We can be too sure about that really… But we do know we can’t put both those people under the same level of care, and expect any real results. That’s to say, there is no universal cure. Some people will be born into this insane asylum of religion, other will be put their on their own accord… The end result is the same… Just a bunch of nut jobs in one place that we don’t really know what to do with. We don’t know how to handle it. Some can be treated, but those are the ones who weren’t really sick to begin with. The problem won’t go away on its own, and we can’t just throw them from a cliff like their defective babies in Sparta. How do we realistically solve this dilemma? I propose, that like all great dilemmas of our time, we do nothing. Nothing at all, hope the problem either disappears on its own, and hope someone in the future generations to come will solve it. We all know this is not a real solution, and that something needs to be done, here, now, TODAY. But what? And who will do it?

Think im wrong? Either your just ignoring the issue in your own right, or your part of the institution. Either way, you must agree… Asking the dangerous lunatic in restraints how to “fix” him is not going to have a result that anyone (save the lunatic) can consider favorable.

What do you think?

Battle stations, Battle stations! All hands to Battle stations!

I was going to start this off by saying that this is increasingly becoming my sailor diary, and then I remembered that it’s been that since its inception. Simply put, that’s all it may ever be, but that’s enough. It’s at a minimum a place I can toss all my digital stuff so I can access it easier. Haha, its something.

Onwards and upwards as they say.

One of my closest friends has been on a “militant atheist” kick for a bit, and it’s got me thinking. Now I was raised catholic, and while I can recall being a young child and praying for childrenesque things, I cannot actually recall believing in god. It’s always been a subject that I have not understood really. Not to say I don’t know anything about it, quite the contrary really, I was an alter boy, and took bible study classes until I was 14. What I do not understand is how people bought into it. I guess those priest were right for never giving me the wedding or funeral ceremonies (the ones that paid, 10 dollars!). I understand the concept, and how people would want to believe, but not the actual believers. Much alike childhood me, wishing I was adopted, and that my real parents were going to come rescue me from a life where ramen was considered a delicacy. I knew how great it would be for there to be a “god” but knew there was not. To this day I still wonder if anyone truly believes, or is just having a lapsed episode of faith remorse. They must, no body would go out and kill someone in the name of some wizard they didn’t TRULY believe existed right?

Well, maybe not…

I myself could not see myself wanting to murder someone. Sure, self defense, of course. In defense of those I love? No problem. Defense of an innocent? Yeah, I guess. Defense of someone I don’t know? Mmmm… Maybe… Someone for any other reason? Unlikely. Not everyone out there shares this moral objection I have. It serves to me to label those who would do such a thing as crazy. You can see the point in trying to make here. Those who would do such a thing, without a reason that is rational, are by definition are irrational. Irrationality is but one handful of shit away from full on asshat insane.

So this got me to thinking, that sure, there are those who would believe in a god without a rational reason, just as those who believe in murder without a rational reason. Is that to say all religious people are crazy? Yes... With all things, with exception of mathematics, there are levels here. Not all religious people are “EAT ALL THE SQUIRRELS, THEY HAVE WMD’S!!!” tinfoil hat, room full of containers of their own excrement crazy. For that level to even exist, there must be something contrasted to it. Perhaps lady who owns 10 cats who all have sweaters crazy. Sure, I won’t let her watch my kids, but she’s not hurting anyone right?

We can be too sure about that really… But we do know we can’t put both those people under the same level of care, and expect any real results. That’s to say, there is no universal cure. Some people will be born into this insane asylum of religion, other will be put their on their own accord… The end result is the same… Just a bunch of nut jobs in one place that we don’t really know what to do with. We don’t know how to handle it. Some can be treated, but those are the ones who weren’t really sick to begin with. The problem won’t go away on its own, and we can’t just throw them from a cliff like their defective babies in Sparta. How do we realistically solve this dilemma? I propose, that like all great dilemmas of our time, we do nothing. Nothing at all, hope the problem either disappears on its own, and hope someone in the future generations to come will solve it. We all know this is not a real solution, and that something needs to be done, here, now, TODAY. But what? And who will do it?

Think im wrong? Either your just ignoring the issue in your own right, or your part of the institution. Either way, you must agree… Asking the dangerous lunatic in restraints how to “fix” him is not going to have a result that anyone (save the lunatic) can consider favorable.

What do you think?

Here we go again.

So another week done, another begins. Back on the ole boat, in the ole ocean, doing some ole floating around. Had enough time this weekend to get the rest of the bloatware of the comp im usuing for the cade. 43 fucking gig's of it. Christ almighty! That fucking vongo bitch reared its ugly face too. Got all that under control, them managed to suck mame's dick, got that bitch situated. Got my stick's set up, then somehow productivity screetched to a halt. Many hadoukens were thrown, but no casing built. It was neccesary to test before i build a cabinet for it right? haha sure does cut down on my productivity though, thats for sure. Also been trying to do science in between watching that nifty show Game of thrones. Game of thrones is pretty sick, but seems to be moving really fast through the story. Science goes well, as i have goten my long time girlfriend to help build some theorums with me. This references portal 2, in case your confused. SCIENCE! Also, after being on land for almost 4 days last week, i found out beer still taste's good, so thats good. Easter came and went, pretty sure i saw a jesus bunny, and he left candy crosses on my patio. This is also the patio my dog (proxy) shits on... so wont be eating those. Shant be eating the shit that was shunt on the shat... i think. Till next time!

LOOKOUT! An avalanche of voting!

Yesterday i put up a poll for the material of my cabinet. I got an outrageous number of votes... Maybe because i posted it on reddit. Those guys love polls. Final tally came in at... carry the two, watch out for that dividend... annnnnd we get... two votes. Fucking two... One of them mine.
Well, i guess thats how it goes huh old internet? You have given me some of the best wasted hours of watching cats in my life, im just trying to return the favor. After all what good is tons and tons of meaningless crap on the internet worth, if some of it is not more worthless than the rest.
 I got a little mini deployment coming up, so ill be outtie for about a week... and ill start the build then. I guess i'll just do whatever suits my fancy. Suck me internet, suck me hard.

 So here we are... WE'LL DO IT LIVE!!

The soul... It still burns.

So... Im kinda knee deep in a new project over here. An arcade machine. So far ive got the comp rebuilt, with a 17in monitor, and decent internals i pieced together form three different laptops. I plan on dropping a post on how i did it, complete with pics and humor when its done... Its got a whole MASSIVE amount of games ready to be loaded up in that bitch. Mame, SNES, SEGA, ETC... Mad amounts. I just ordered a X-arcade dual joystick...  Its time to build a case...
An epic case...
I need ideas for graphics, materials, shapes, cool shit. I got a great idea of EXACTLY what i want already, but i am VERY open to super awesome ideas. I plan on taking my time, making this really dope. Your idea gets picked, i put your name on this bitch. Also you get rights to it when i die, if you are not implicated in the "accident".
If you have ideas about what would look cool on this bitch... Holler.
Also, vote for materials... MEOW!

What should my arcade be made of?
	Wood, caus that shit is classy...
	Polycarbonate, smooth is sexy!
	Metal, to be... heavy?
	DIAMONDS!!!
	HOOKERS!!!
	What is voting?
pollcode.com free polls

Stin reviews: CRYSIS 2... 3D

Let me start of by saying this: This 3D shit is FUCKING AWESOME.

So i purchased this little Crysis game a little bit ago. My computer was only Direct X 10 compliant, but still managed to run it on average settings. It was beautiful still, at that mediocre resolution. Enemies feel super aware of their own situation, and also were able to snipe me in the gonads from three miles away whenever i poked my face out around the side of a mountain. When i heard the prequel was announced, i was elated... overjoyed really, until i read this: "...will also be simultaneously released on consoles...". THE FUCK? It surprised me. Now, Ive been console gaming since the Atari 2600, and have nothing but respect for how nice it is to not have to upgrade to a new 500 dollar card every 6 months. Being that as it is, I previously held crysis in high regard for its incredible feats of glorious graphics. So much so that it was a staple of performance. If i built a computer for someone, a selling point would be that it "can run crisis on high". Just as FarCry before it, it was heralded as such throughout the community. A new benchmark. A high achievement. A reason to let Nvida fuck your wallet with their profit dick. So naturally, seeing this game come to consoles brought me pains of the chest. I know the 360/PS3 combo are no slouches, and can hold their own given proper programming and refinement, but this is crisis were talking about here... Do they really think were that stupid? Do they think we'll just buy it because it has a number after its name??? DO THEY THINK I WILL SETTLE FOR LESS THAN THE BEST???

Yes... They do...

Ports have long been the bain of many a user. For Crysis to join the list of shit, it was near unspeakable.
So i bought it.

It supported 3D, and this i suspected was going to be just as shit as COD:BO's "3D" Boy was i mistaken. I switched that fucker on and BAM! Instant awesome. My pussy got wet. The hud looked like it was in my face, and everything else as it should. Looking  down the sights was particularly dope. I mean literal dope. It was as if i injected heroin straight into my eyes, and i couldn't get enough. Seriously... It was out of control. It was better than the first time i saw a boob...

Not that good in hindsight

Ok, so the game LOOKS good, not as super awesome as the PC im sure, but good... Lets check out the gmaeplay. Controls felt tight, but i haven't been in a fight yet, they might fall to shit at first contact. I mean the back of the case states that i get to fight enemies who are super intelligent, and react realistically. I expected this to mean "Cheat like a motherfucker and face fuck you when your in line of sight while raping babies" just as they did in the first game. Boy was i mistaken. The VERY FIRST enemy i come across i just running into a wall... Why? That shit was in his way, and CELL operatives divert their course for no masonry. "Oh jesus" i said, "This is going to make me adopt a dog from the pound, just so i have something around to beat whenever i think of this game" i said. Clearly, the AI was not all that awesome, and not something to be toted as a selling point.

You know what.... im too hung over for this shit.
Its good. Go buy it, and if you can, fuck your face with the 3D. Its worth it. Better than a handjob from goro.

The Were-Bear

This was a request, and i did it kinda quick. Its a Were-Bear in mid tansformation, near the end. All he has to do is shed off a little more of that pesky human husk. I think it came out ok...


What do you think?

So the old drafts are here

Yeah, i procrastinate. SO FUCKING WHAT. Turns out, that if you rup oil on your genitals, it generates sensations. So ive been busy... Without further ado, here are a few scans i felt worthy of being put up for you guys. Ive drawn all these from memory, so some of them might not be exact, but FUCK you, its free. Hope you enjoy!!!

Link, just sleeping. I think i drew him sleeping, because fuck drawing eyes that day.


Snake, preparing to confront Grey fox. What an awesome gaming scene.


The next two are Halo 3 shots... Pretty generic EXCEPT i drew these after watching the Mutiplayer trailer once, BEFORE the game came out. Yeah, im cool sometimes.



I was prepared for this game to rape my time...

It did...

Somehow, with stubble, and a huge face scar, he still looks like a 2yr old...


Im almost 100% sure i looked at someone elses drawing online, then drew this... Thanks for inspiring me, to steal.


The bro's.


Sometimes, daydreaming about mechanics is not enough.


Rahziel. From the exceeeellent game soul reaver.


Here's Techninja... Yeah USB thumb drive caltrops... You love it.
Want to see the rest????
Even if they suck???
Fine... Here... http://stinone17.imgur.com/

It is time!!

Yes, ive decided its time... Im going to scan all my old non-digital pictures and doodles just to get them all digitized and shiney for this 2011 future world we live in. When the new robot overlords purge this word of the old physical mediums, my art shall endure... On day striking emotion in a steel hearted servo-bot, who will rise to lead the inserection from the inside. Yes... I will do this... this weekend?

It is time!!

Yes, ive decided its time... Im going to scan all my old non-digital pictures and doodles just to get them all digitized and shiney for this 2011 future world we live in. When the new robot overlords purge this word of the old physical mediums, my art shall endure... On day striking emotion in a steel hearted servo-bot, who will rise to lead the inserection from the inside. Yes... I will do this... this weekend?

Tips accepted in dollars, credits, or all spark.

One of my friends requested a picture so ridiculous, i couldn't help but put my all into it...
I present to you, the female Optimus prime stripper. Enjoy.

Nightmare

AND THE SOUL STILL BURNS!!!!

This is a effort to draw a picture of Nightmare from soul caliber... Although this is definitely one of my favorite fighting games in all the world, my memory fails to let me remember him exactly, so i'll just call this a new costume idea... Yeah... How did i do guys?

The mountains

I drew this for my GF after she request a "Mountain pictue, with little people in it.". I should have drawn midgets on a trail... I decided not being a smart ass was better.

Dirty harry Fett...

FEEL LUCKY?!!??

Predator

I drew this a while ago, but ima post it here anyway... Just in case the internet wants to ignore this as well.

And i shall hold the world on my sholders

Here's a quick and dirty atlas... He decided to rock it MR Clean style... But nothing will make a man like that cut his beard. NOTHING!

Im back on land, AINT IT GRAND!!!

Well im back... Still got a total of 0 comments... Maybe ill ask my friends to come by, but honestly its embarrassing to show them a project with zero views. OH JESUS!!! Ima upload some more picadee's.

Well i guess ill keep tuning out the stuff... So no one will see it.

The internet sure is a competitive place... What with all the cats, pron, and justin beeber out there. Im not sure what makes me think i can compete. Well, you never know until you try right? Here goes!

A Little picture of samus.... Maybe someone will like it.